My husband, Micah, and I recently celebrated our 2nd wedding anniversary. We have been so blessed with two wonderful years of marriage, filled with adventure. We recently sat down and talked about some of the things we have learned about or from marriage in the past two years. We are no experts by any means, but we did come up a pretty good list of things. Maybe you can relate….
1. Patience
Patience is everything. As I have mentioned in a previous blog post, I’m not the most patient person. I’m always ready for the next season of life and to reach my goals. Micah has dreams with his side business that he hopes to achieve. Being patient as you are working and sacrificing to build your life together isn’t always fun. You may even feel like you’re not making much progress. However, it is such a blessing and encouragement to look back from where your started and to see how far you have come. Patience is everything in each season, especially in these first years of marriage.
2. Be Spontaneous
This one was Micah’s. He said it is important to mix it up, visit new places, and make memories together. I completely agree. I am a very spontaneous person. I am always looking for the next trip to take, the new restaurant to try, etc. Micah is comfortable staying with what’s familiar. However, he thanks me all the time for making him step out of his comfort zone and try new things. Making memories with your partner in life is definitely my favorite.
3. Encouragement
Something God has taught me is the importance of constantly encouraging your spouse-in their job, their dreams, their passions. As school teachers, Micah and I both have days where we feel drained and discouraged. In any job, it’s so easy to become stressed out or simply just tired. It is so important to remind your spouse of their purpose and to encourage him/her about what an amazing job he/she is doing. Some days, knowing that your spouse is proud of you is the only thing that keeps you going.
4. Selflessness
I’ve said it many times before, but the biggest thing I have learned from marriage is how selfish of a person I am. The first years in marriage are tricky as you are trying to navigate living with another person. You are learning to constantly put someone else’s needs before your own. You are working and sacrificing not only for your goals but their’s as well. Your dreams become their’s and their dreams become yours. You truly become one. And because we are naturally selfish beings, it isn’t always easy as you are learning to always put someone else before you. The Lord has taught me so much, and it has been such a beautiful journey.
5. Communication
They say communication is key and they would be right! There is no way around it- in order to have a successful marriage, you have to talk about everything. Feelings, fears, goals, dreams, faith, mistakes, failures, finances, everything. You have to be completely transparent in all things.
6. Keep the Past in the Past
Gosh, this is important. For biblical advice on marriage, I often refer to “The Love Chapter”, 1 Corinthians 13. In this passage is one of my favorite verses, “Love keeps no record of wrongs.” Marriage is designed to be a picture of God’s love for us. Unconditional, eternal. God says that when He forgives us, He casts our sins as far as the east is from the west, never to be brought up again. Our marriages should reflect this. If you say you forgive your spouse of something, it should be gone forever. That isn’t always easy to do, but thankfully, God will equip you with the strength you need to reflect Him in your marriage. And it’s such a beautiful thing.
7. Prayer
Praying for your partner for crucial. One of the most important things in your marriage is covering your spouse in prayer. Knowing that so many things can happen in life can be so scary. You learn to depend on God to keep your spouse safe and healthy. I find myself constantly in prayer for Micah- that God gives him safety, guards his heart, and fills him with purpose and joy. Marriage gives you an even greater reliance on God’s power and protection over life and marriage.
8. Forgiveness
Forgive. Forgive often. Forgive first. Forgive quickly. Like I said before, your marriage should be a reflection of God’s love for us. We can’t be that without forgiveness. Life is too short, and we aren’t guaranteed tomorrow. I’ve heard that said so many times in my life, but it has a much more real meaning now that I am married. I don’t want to spend a second of my marriage wasting time arguing about something silly. Life is precious and every moment should be cherished. So you learn to forgive quickly and move on.
9. Remember Why
Life gets busy. You will get frustrated, annoyed, aggravated, stressed, overwhelmed. Sometimes you will lose your patience. But don’t forget why. Why you chose your husband/wife. Why you love them. Why you couldn’t imagine life without them. In the midst of your frustration, remember why and focus on those reasons.
Lastly, don’t forget that you have your own faults and shortcomings that your spouse chooses to overlook and loves you in spite of those things.
We are only two years in, but this has been the most incredible journey. It is hard work but so very worth it in every way. The most beautiful thing to me is two people seeking the Lord and building a life together. My marriage is one of the most precious and valuable things to me- second to my relationship with Christ. It is such a blessing to experience life with my best friend every day, and I am so excited for what the Lord has in store for us.
xoxo, Av
Comentarios